CAUTION: Long Winded Sarcasm Ahead
Well I have to be honest, I never intended to EVER do more than one post on here per day, but this one is off topic anyway, so I'm letting myself slide. Basically, I just came through 5 O'clock Rush Hour for the third day in a row without cigarettes and it's high time that I got to vent a little. Seeing as how after Monday, everyone I know decided that they wouldn't answer the phone if I called around that time of day ever again. I mean, it was bad enough when I did smoke. But the great thing about today was, I came up with an idea that, granted might not fix all of the hassels and problems of driving the interstates and roadways of the greater Nashville Metro area, but it would take care of a great many of them.
The idea actually occurred to me just after I was abruptly cut off by a black Cadillac Escalade, with spinning rims which I believe were meant to hypnotize me so that I would not pay attention to the entire incident, but fortunately failed to do so. That's beside the point though. The point is that my grand revelation occured just after this hypnotizing, mechanical monstrosity cut me off, and right at the exact moment that I was forced to swerve as they abruptly turned into an Exxon station, off to terrorize its unsuspecting patrons no doubt. But I thought to myself, with all the technology available to us today, wouldn't it be great if someone were to design a device which would enable us to signal to other drivers when you needed to do things such as switch lanes, or make abrupt right hand turns into Exxon stations. Perhaps, a little sign, that rotated on the back of the car stating which direction you intended to move your vehicle. NO WAIT!! Lights! Two of them, one on each side of the rear of the car, which would flash on and off when you intended to turn, or change lanes. The right one for when you wanted to go right. And the left for when you wanted to go left. These lights could be controlled from within the interior of the car. By...um...say...two switches located on the dashboard, just above the radio and a/c controls. One switch for each light. Although on second thought it would be better if they were more accessible. I KNOW, you could put them on the steering column, so that people could hit these switches without even taking their hands off of the steering wheel. Just outstretch their fingers and flip the switch. BUT, it could be difficult to remember which switch was which, I mean, sure left from right is easy but in a quick situation like the one I found myself in today it could be difficult, and people might hit the wrong one in a panic. So why don't we make it one switch. A LEVER IN FACT, so that you cannot miss it, even if you tried. And if you want to turn left, you tap the lever into the downward position and thus the flashing light on the left side of the car would flash, and if you want to turn right, you tap the lever into the upward position, and the flashing light on the right side of the vehicle would begin to flash. I mean that's just perfect. It's like everything's been thought of. All the guess work is taken out of the situation, and iit would be so conveniently located that there would be no reason not to use it. Wouldn't it be great? We could call them...um....flashers....no....sounds like a perv in a trenchcoat.....um....turners....no....sounds like a meglomanicacal billionare....um...I'VE GOT IT...BLINKERS!! We could call them BLINKERS!!! My god it's amazing that someone hasn't thought of this already. I mean, just imagine how much easier things would be if people had blinkers that they could use!! And I mean, I'm sure they'd use them if they had them, ya know? Like I said before, there'd really be no reason not too. I mean, people have no problems using their A/C, or their Cruise, or their radios, or their cellphones even!!! And I mean, the "blinker" would be a LOT easier to activate than ANY of those things. But, there is one problem. All those other things are designed to make life more convenient for the person using them, and the blinker,. after all, would be designed to make things convenient for everyone else. And really though, who has the time, or the desire to make things convenient on others, even if it is that simple?!? Oh well, stupid idea. 